The Year End Rigmarole !

Its the time of the year when destinies are pronounced. Either you get to be king or a loser.
The last Quarter of the year which is every sales guys torment.


Expectations are high, opportunities are scattered. History confines you so much that you dont
want to dissapoint. You have a point to prove and you bloody well do it. And of course, Paradise beckons the moguls.


Its a mad onslaught in which we all get imbibed in. The run to surmount, the run to subsist, the run to just show that we are running,


As Morrison said,


Not to touch the earth
Not to see the sun
Nothing left to do, but
Run, run, run
Let's run


House upon the hill
Moon is lying still
Shadows of the trees
Witnessing the wild breeze
C'mon baby run with me
Let's run


The mansion is warm, at the top of the hill
Rich are the rooms and the comforts there
Red are the arms of luxuriant chairs
And you won't know a thing till you get inside


Run with me
Run with me
Let's run

Another Year Down !!

Another year passes by.

Another year with no significant achievements in life except for more money than the last year. Another year with the same insecurities, same unfulfilled ambitions, same frustrations and more or less the same people in life.

Should I do something different this year ? Let me make some resolutions like everybody and their second cousin do..

Resolutions which I will not follow

1. I will no longer waste my time reliving the past, instead I will spend it worrying about the future

2. I will give up chocolates totally. 100%. Completely. Honestly....

3. I will stop sending e-mail, Instant Messages, SMSes and be on the phone at the same time with the same person.

4. I won't worry so much.

5. Drool and have sleepless nights over the black BMW X1.

Resolutions which I will follow

1. Chat more over phone / Internet.

2. Put on atleast 5 Kgs

3. Procrastinate more

4. Drink and drink some more

5. Eat out more

6. Buy that sexy sleek Mac Air which i deserve

7. Buy a Wi, PS3, Kinect (One of these). Just to stop me from spending more time on the phone.

8. Keep in touch with old friends who have gained more weight than me

Dabangggg.......

For starters...Dabangg means fearless..I guess in Bhojpuri..

Watched this brain basher of a movie today. Every newspaper says its beaten 3 idiots. Not sure about that but it surely has beaten an idiot like me. Its a known fact that all Salman movies are no brainers. So, will stick to a few things that i noticed that were different in this movie.

Dabangg should get the Oscar or National award (Paa one) or watever for coming up with the weirdest names for characters in bollywood film history..

1. Chulbul Pandey -(Mischevious Pandey). The hero. Mouths dialogues like "Dekhen, kiske batashe kitney gol hain" which means " lets see whose balls are how round" or sumting like that.

2. Rajo - (Roja Mis spelt). Shatrughan Sinha's daughter looks just like him. Very masculine.

3. Prajapati Pandey - (Publichusband Pandey)..The step father

4.Makkhi - (Fly).. The zombie step brother who mysteriously manages to have a bomb as a

girlfriend

5. Chedi Singh - (Hole driller Singh)..The Villian

6. Munni - (Little One)..Malaika...Nothing little about her though.

Dabangg is also quite unique as it has a lot of songs, dances, fights which have no freaking connection to each other.

And of course the quintessential muscles ripping the shirt off scene in the climax..

A Frustrated Nation

Once upon a time ( as close as a decade back), scandals such as the Bofors, match fixing or the kidney racket used to shock us. How could all this happen in our country ? The newspapers used to leave us with a feeling of being cheated.

A decade later, India has emerged as a land of perverts. Scandals of an earlier time are now passe, cursory and demure. We have emerged as a nation out to prove its prurience. After all, we wrote the Kamasutra. So we need to be known for our libidos. So what if they are satisfied in a treacherous way.

Delhi, is now known as the rape capital. A few hundred people molest two girls on a new year eve at Mumbai. A bunch of fundamentalist rogues thrash girls in public at Mangalore. Kerala's sordid sex sagas never end. Goa is the land of sun, sea and sleaze.

Some of these scandals really stand apart not only for their gory nature but also because of the sheer negligence shown by the Indian judicial system in punishing the offenders.

- A paedophile and a lunatic team up in Nithari to go on a long cycle of rapes and murders. Around 30 skeletons were unearthed from their backyard. The lunatic is in jail and will remain there for ever and the paedophile could be out very soon. Nobody hanged....

-A recent article in a newspaper highlighted the plight of a nurse who was strangled during a rape and has lived for about 30 years as a vegetable in the hospital. The accused works in a different hospital and has escaped conviction.

-A Director General of Police molests a 15 year old girl and drives her to suicide. Case closed. No conviction.

We could write a big fat book on all the sexual atrocities commited in our country for the last 4-5 years. Politicians, Film stars ( Shiney Whiney), Policemen, Priests etc etc. These people have put the common crook to shame.

Lets move to the latest one. Mr. ND Tiwari. 86 years old and with 3 women at one time.

Awesome ! ! He is the brand ambassador for a frustrated nation called India. His virility could put Viagra to shame...

Frank Zappa - Weird

Have been reading quite a bit about Frank Zappa. It is amazing that a weird character like him had attained the status of a Rock cult. His music was widely admired by millions of people. He was in a true sense the complete Rock Legend of the 70's and the 80's.

What people liked about him is still a mystery. He stood out in a time when there were icons such as Pink Floyd, Jim Morrison, Eagles etc. His foul and funny lyrics were consciously crass, earning him cult status though at times masking the complexity of his compositions. Of all the qualities that typified Frank Zappa, perhaps the most striking is that he was a paradox.

Some weird facts that i came across about Frank Zappa.

- Frank Zappa had four children. Their names demonstrate Zappa's devotion to eccentricity. The children are named Moon Unit, Dweezil, Ahmet Rodan, and Diva.

- A famous Zappa quote "Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe".

- A surprising number of things have been named after Frank Zappa, including two asteroids:

3834 Zappafrank, and 16745 Zappa. Also in the list is the ZapA gene of a microbe that causes infections of the urinary tract, a goby fish, a jellyfish, and extinct mollusk, and a spider, which is said to have a marking that resembles Zappa's famous moustache.

Some strange lyrics -

Hey! do you know what you are?

Youre an asshole! an asshole!

Some of you might not agree

Cause you probably likes a lot of misery

But think a while and you will see...

Broken hearts are for assholes

Broken hearts are for assholes

Are you an asshole?

Broken hearts are for assholes

Are you an asshole too?

Whatcha gonna do, cause you're an asshole...

Why does it hurt when I pee?

Why does it hurt when I pee?

I don't want no doctor

To stick no needle in me

Why does it hurt when I pee?

I got it from the toilet seat

I got it from the toilet seat

It jumped right up

N grabbed my meat

Got it from the toilet seat

My balls feel like a pair of maracas

My balls feel like a pair of maracas

Oh God I probably got the

Gon-o-ka-ka-khackus!

My balls feel like a pair of maracas

Ai-ee-ai-ee-ahhhh!

Why does it

Why does it

Why does it

Why does it hurt...when i

Peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?

The Shawshank Redemption

I thought of myself as a movie fanatic but am surprised that i missed this particular one for fifteen years.

Based on Stephen King's short novel "Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption", this movie is brilliant storytelling through and through, with a depth in thematic imagery and symbolism, it transcends being just another prison film. It lets us know that even amid the most trying of circumstances, hope should never be extinguished.

When I first started watching this movie, it was like, oh great, a slow movie about prison life.

Somewhere along the way, I forgot I was watching a movie, and became so engrossed in it, that I felt like I was in the film, a part of it. The movie is absolutely riveting, the narration is incredible, and the story...wow, what a story. Put that together with a great cast, awesome soundtrack, and one of the best endings of all time, and you have a timeless classic. Simply wonderful!!

Der Untergang

Curler....An epitome of narcissism in our office is finally taking a ride to nowhere.

The tail cutter has gullibly fallen for the "National role" ballyhoo. Somebody who used to think of himself as a Chanakya will soon be reduced to being the court jester. What happened to all your evil intellect Mr. Curler ? Did you miss a move somewhere ?

Iam a bit dissappointed though. I thought Curler would be a tougher enemy to fight than this. August 14th will be marked in our company's history as a day when they conquered a ten year old disease which was threatening the entire system's existence. I though would like to take 20% credit for all thats happening. Curler , you bastard , this is my gift to you for whatever you did to my closest friend.

And a salute to our Batter Babu for so effortlessly tackling a problem which we thought could never be solved. He is like Khairnar for us. Out on a demolition drive. First it was Kumar and now its Curler. I only hope people like Gunny realise that its safer to be behind the bulldozer than walking in front of it.

Now that Curlers kingdom is crashing, what will happen to his loyal farceurs like KK and Coco. I guess they will need to wait with their tongues out. I for sure will not miss an opportunity now to beat the shit out of them.

Hey Curler, I heard you sold your car too...I can only think of these lines for you at this moment

And all the roads jam up with credit

And there's nothing you can do

It's all just pieces of paper flying away from you

Oh look out world, take a good look

What comes down here

You must learn this lesson fast and learn it well

This ain't no upwardly mobile freeway

Oh no, this is the road

this is the road

This is the road to hell

P.S..I would like to apologise to Chris Rhea for having used his lines for a jerk like Curler..

Der Untergang means "The Downfall"..(for those people taking German tuitions)..